It's chilly around the edges today, as I decided to take a sick day; to recharge from a week or so of feeling crummy. I know exactly what's going on and I know I'll pull through. It happens. This sickness may just be my body's way of throwing out a bit of a detox, to get ready to build up to a level that pushes me forward and toward some really exciting things. Things which I'm currently petrified of. It'll pass.
I decided that -this year- I'm focusing on personal work. The trouble with such a decision is that I have now had to learn how to say no, or that I can't help when I'd like to, because I have to make time for me. Saying no is terribly difficult. It feels selfish and yet somewhat refreshing, because it's new. I have no idea what to do with myself. Again, this too will pass.
When we urge ourselves toward something new and unfamiliar, there is a common reaction of apprehension. I know that this decision will help me grow, through experience and experimentation. The trouble is that this leaves such an open space to struggle, fall hard, and maybe even fail. Failure is an irrational phobia, I feel. What defines our failure? I don't think failure has anything to do with attempting something new. Failure would be not trying at all. Yet, it's so easy for me to just sit and wonder how to start... but that's the beginning of the beginning stages. I started without even noticing. And here I was, waiting for it to happen.
I grew up making things for people, and yet it sometimes feels like a foreign language. When you work for an audience of your own creation, like I do, it can present a certain roadblock filled with far too much assumption that it will lead to disappointment. Who is this audience, and what's the worst that can happen? I can't predict the future, but I can approach it with confidence and make it fun. How about some fart drawings? Sure.
Right now, I'm working on a new brand. I feel that Dear Libby now marks a certain time in my life, which I feel ready to leave behind; to focus on positivity, and the incredible changes which I've experienced in my life. I've chosen a name which makes me smile, which focuses on the now, and encourages so much fun. I'm still figuring out the design and branding of this new name, and how to display things. Once it starts to take shape, you, my lovely audience, will be the first to know about it. You guys are just the best. You keep me going. I mean that.
Thank you.
