enjoy

I choose to keep myself inspired. It isn't always easy, but I feel that sometimes the key is to not go looking for it. Get outside, explore the unknown, get up close and touch it. The world is a lovely place, and damn this spring has been amazing. When the sun is out, and I need a break, I go to the trails and get lost for hours. Nature is calm and patient. It listens. There is no rush. Enjoy the world. It has a whole lot to share.

I take far more time to myself, to stop. I'm looking to add even more of this time to my days, because I realize it's necessary, especially when it comes to disconnecting from the office part of my home. I could work all day, if I'm not careful. Sometimes, I do. To keep from burnout; I turn off my phone, I keep all forms of technology out of my bedroom, I go to bed earlier (still working on reading before bed), I don't answer emails on weekends... It's all a balance. Down time needs to happen in order to keep going. Technology is just far too distracting from what is actually important. Shut it off and enjoy real life. Your energy will thank you.

Play. It can be difficult to allow myself to experiment with personal projects, when there is so much to do for everyone else. I'm prone to giving to others before I even consider to do much for myself at all. I realize that when I put off the things I want to do, I become rebellious toward the restrictions I put on myself, and I see tension in my work. It's unnecessary. Personal work is just as important as any other work, because it stretches the creative muscles. Either pout, shout, or play. Enjoy yourself.

I'm also learning how to do absolutely nothing. Nothing. No sound, no distractions, nothing. It's how I start my mornings, without looking at a single email until I eat, bathe, meditate, and sort out what I'm doing for the day. Nothing is so urgent I can't enjoy a little bit of time to myself. Enjoy space. 

The more I learn to shut down and take time away from waste, the more I realize that I'm able to put time into the things that interest me most. Since I was a kid, I've enjoyed writing. I have more to share on this topic because it is big. All I can say, to condense it, is to test out your true interests. The ones that have always been there. Your dreams are valid. Explore what they are trying to say, and make something. Enjoy it for yourself (share later, maybe).

In the mix, I'm working on a lot of pieces of myself. I realize that I drifted into a bit of a state of insecurity, as I tend to do on occasion. I want to write more about this topic as well, because I feel this is a big one, with a number of solutions. In short, reactions are funny. Sometimes from others, and sometimes for ourselves. There's just so much fluff surrounding self love and happiness, seeming arrogant and phoney. If you can't believe in it, or accept it, no one else will. Enjoy proper love. You do deserve it.

Sometimes, it all feels like a lot of work. I don't always have good days, or days where I do work that I'm proud of.  I don't always have productive days, or rewarding days. I sometimes have days where I fall off completely from being responsible, or seeing my own achievements for what they are. It's a part of life, to roll with the punches and learn from the experience. When I go outside, I choose a different path (literally), every day. Each time, I see that it leads me to another layer of discovery, another reason to keep pushing forward to see what comes next after that, and after that. No one is standing in your way, but you. 

Enjoy the adventure.