2.2.12

fluffy february: day 2 : roads

I was thinking about it today -after yesterday's disoriented episode- how happy I am to be here and how proud I should be for doing so successfully, on my own. I took a picture on the way (during my first solo road trip) so I could sieze the moment, because it was something I had wanted for a very long time; control, freedom, independence, time to myself to figure it all out. I was at that very moment -and still am- quite petrified. I fucking love it, if you'll excuse my French.


As the baby of the family, I don't think I had much room to breathe, as I often had things taken from me or done for me, without even asking for it. Despite the good intentions of those around me, I was definitely conditioned into being slightly rebellious, while it also made me incredibly insecure about trying new things and trusting them completely. I have always preferred to do things in my own way, at my own pace, and sans the implications that there is a better/faster/easier way to do it... it's just that this approach was a little bit different and quite a leap away from my comfort zone. I don't know where I'm going with this, really. All I know is that I got here in one piece, on my own, am still alive, and am constantly moving forward. I'm petrified, as I said before, but shit, man...

I love it all.

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